GDPR for Children
There are a number of children, including BARRY and LUCY, running and playing. GERRY is a large, somewhat rubbery looking Giraffe, wearing a bowtie and a stethoscope. The children immediately gather round him to hear what he has to say.
GERRY - Hi Kids!
It’s me, Gerry the GDPR Giraffe, and I’m here to tell you all about GDPR!
BARRY - What’s GDPR Gerry?
GERRY - What a great question!
GDPR stands for “General Data Protection Regulation” and it’s an exciting new bunch of rules from Europe, all about how we handle the information we have about you! But don’t worry – just like all the other rules we blame on the EU, we fully intend to keep these after Brexit – so the fun won’t stop!
LUCY - What do you mean “information we have about you”?
GERRY - Well Lucy, here at Gerry’s Treehouse of Fun and Burnett Edgar Medical Centre, we have to keep records about all our friends and patients and to help us keep track of their medicines, and make sure we know which of you like cookies with their bedtime milk. There are already very strict rules about who we can share this information with, but now with GDPR we can have even more!
(The children cheer again.)
For instance, we will now have to keep a record of all the different types of data we hold – like data about health, data about cookies, or data about whether you love rainbows or unicorns best.
We will then have to say which laws allow us to keep or share that data, list all the people that we might want to give it to and why, and describe all the security measures we are going to take. To ensure big bad men don’t take it away and sell it to the Americans to rig elections - like they did with your Facebook entries.
LUCY - Well, that’s good to know Gerry! Should I tell all my friends?
GERRY - No need Lucy! Every practice will have to produce a simple, easy to understand Privacy Notice by the time the new rules start on the 25th May – so everyone can experience the joy of reading data protection regulations!
But that’s not all! Everyone will be able to access all their records either themselves, or through another person, if you give permission. Not just things on the computer, but all the silly little pieces of paper that someone shoved into a folder 30 years ago that no-one was planning on ever looking at again – but first we’ll have to go through them all, and make sure there are no naughty references to other people, or things that would make you super-duper-sad.
BARRY - Wow! That sounds fun Gerry!
GERRY - Yes! So much fun, that we won’t be able to charge you for it. No matter how long it takes.
LUCY - This sounds amazing Gerry, can we join in?
GERRY - Of course you can Lucy! In fact, we have to have a designated Data Protection Officer so perhaps you’d like the job?
(The children laugh.)
No, seriously. We can’t find anyone. I’m not allowed to do it despite knowing all about it, because it would be a “conflict of interest”. (GERRY does air quotes with his hooves.) You’ll need expert knowledge all about data protection law and the GDPR itself, as well as an extensive understanding of how General Practice works – so you might need to read a few books.
LUCY - I love reading!
GERRY - Great! Because we can’t find anyone else, and we certainly can’t afford to pay an adult. You’ll work for cookies, right? Oh, and speaking of not being able to afford things, guess how much we can be fined if we get it wrong?
BARRY - (Whispers) One hundred pounds?
GERRY - Not quite Barry. Nice try.
LUCY - One million Squishies.
GERRY - Closer. It’s 10 million Euros
(Children all go “oooooh”)
That’s certainly an awful lot of squishies, isn’t it kids? Now, why don’t you go and play with Jim the GMC Jackal whilst I go sit in the corner and weep?